After all, what is natural?

I was busy writing my Republic of Cascadia research paper and I decided I wanted candy.

When I entered the lobby of 20th street, I also entered a conversation about healthy living. A small girl that I've never heard speak was a well-oiled vegan machine. The security guard on duty, Cansino, must have asked.

"If you want energy, real energy, I wholly recommend cacao. Just pure, natural chocolate. It's rather bitter, so you can mix it with some [something] or brown sugar, whatever you like. I personally like to mix it with gogi berries, a real superfood. The Chinese have it listed in most of their remedies. It has 18 of 22 amino acids, more vitamin A than carrots and more iron than spinach. It has cancer-fighting [words] and you'll never get sick!... Well anyways, I think cacao is too bitter on its own, so I mix it with gogi; it's like a sweet treat. Dave Wolfe eats cacao every day and I see him as one of the best, one of my natural health living idols, but that seems..."

She breathed.

"and Daniel Vitalis has a plan for everything, how to be efficient on a plane, indoors, outdoors, exercise... If you watch his videos on youtube, it will change your life."
(I thought, like New Slang?)

She continued to speak, it was becoming more fluid, less robotic. I thought to myself that I should really know what she's talking about. Health religions are started in Oregon, aren't they? I'm from there. I need to be in on this.

"...And cancer can be cured. What if I told if you take 300 grams of Lyceum and it will stop your cancer dead in its tracks? David Wolfe knows this. It's cutting-edge stuff."

And by that point, I agreed with her. You're right. AIDS was a conspiracy. I can live to be 200. There is nothing in my way. I need to start eating only raw foods and foraging in Central Park. If I do this, then my yin will balance with my yang and I Can't POSSIBLY eat anything that isn't made of pure vegetables and Western medicine is rather suspect and I will understand...
Oh right,
This is the kind of person that's attracted to The New School.
I smiled. She thought it was intrigue, but it was closer to amusement.

"We'll talk again sometime later," she said, now directed at me, as if she wasn't in a conversation in the first place. "I know I talk really fast and it's a lot to remember."

I nodded and, wanting to be standing in the fresh rain with the cement smell, left.

I ended up buying a candy bar.