I believe (NPR

Assignment for Writing 122:

Sappy side:

I believe in the second chance that a new day brings. I believe in the warmth of waking up in the morning knowing that the mistakes and misunderstanding of yesterday are part of the past. I learned this from the days after I was depressed and suicidal, but mostly, forgetful.
With my freshman year of high school peppered with failed relationships and rumors of pregnancy, I was willing to close my eyes and walk in the street. I was serious when I said I wanted to kill myself. I felt as if there was no way out of a dropping out of high school and a dead-end job. I had walked myself into a corner that was also between a rock and a hard place. The only option I saw was to let go of fear, and die.
I still do not know whether I was being outright melodramatic, or if my small mind could only comprehend the surreal disaster that I believed my life was by equating it to a life and death situation. Now, it doesn’t matter.
I started each morning with silence and patience. I trudged out to my bus stop and calmly, soundlessly sobbed as I measured the speed of each passing vehicle in my head, tallying whether or not I would have died if I would have jumped into one of their grills. This process went on for months.
With the help of my loyal peers and counseling sessions I grew less despondant. Looking back, though, with retrospect being one of the most beautiful talents of man, I remember taking pleasure in the exact same things as I do now. I eat, run, and mope exactly the same way, whether or not I was desiring my life to be over. So was there any difference, really, between my life then and now?
Yes. I know that every day is temporary, now. I was so head up about everything in the present being so important and grave that I was willing to end today. Tomorrow hadn’t even come, yet.
On one morning, with little importance otherwise, I opened my eyes with a different frame of mind. That morning, I didn’t think about yesterday, and hardly about today.
From that day, and every day after, I focused on what’s to happen next.
Tomorrow is different day; it’s kind of like starting over,
This I believe.

Realistic, though, dishonest side:

I believe in destroying borders with no reservations. I believe in acting on whims and making the unexpected, expected. I believe in popping personal bubbles and making others uncomfortable. I learned this from the blank stares and open gawks that have made me the happy person I am today.
My instances of daring unforeseen and actions have made life wonderful. For instance, I walked out of my house seven months ago, on a drug-ridden street, the moon dawning high in the sky. A man trots and wobbles past my lawn, with furtive glances backwards every off-beat.
“Good Evening!”
He looked confused and angry. He meandered towards some drunken destination. It didn’t surprise me to see his mug on the front of the Metro section in the Oregonian. Albeit, in the paper, he was clean-shaven and sober, he was still the same man. Something made him clean up his act and build synagogues throughout the Portland metro-area. I believe I had a hand in that, especially my unexpected greeting.
I hate that norms are accepted and followed by so many, with so little room for personal differences. What I love is moving past those norms and refreshing the system. “Welcome to Wendy’s; how is your night going?”
“Oh, My GOD! Thank you for asking me that question! I was hoping someone would ask me. I AM SO INCREDIBLE; YOU HAVE NO IDEA! LIFE IS THE BEST THING I HAVE EVER EXPERIENCED!” The woman on the other side of the microphone was smiling. I know this because she told me… on our wedding night, three years later.
On the same note as the unexpected, taking risks has worked out for everyone that has worked, indirectly, to bring up my birth. My great-grandfather (on my biological father’s side) had a terrible heart attach when he was living in Germany, before immigrating to the United States. He took at chance and became the first man ever to have open heart surgery performed upon him.
The only way to be truly happy with your life is to take risks. My best example is George Washington. His story need not be retold.
Take risks and succeed. This, I believe.